Redirecting is changing the direction of focus. For a child who struggles with rapid thoughts, paranoia, or obsessive behaviors, redirecting is a tool a parent can immediately use to help their child.
Today I was reminded of the beautiful tool of humor in our family. My husband has a unique gift to redirect my son with stupid humor. It works every time. No matter the situation. Although it sounds crazy, I really don't know where we would be without it. Humor was used several times today. We use it to redirect behavior, obsessions, paranoia and mania whenever possible.
Other redirecting tools we use were shared earlier. Sometimes they work, sometimes they don't. A simple touch, pat on the back, nudge during church. Like I said, sometimes they work. If he has allowed the rapid thoughts to escalate to extreme anxiety, a much stronger approach is necessary.
The stronger ones would include yelling "hey" from one of us. Obviously to make this effective, we don't use this often. Too many loud noises make him even more manic, so it's a simple one loud yell. Clapping can be used, too.
One of the hardest tools we use is getting in his face and yelling at him. This is a last resort and is used the least. If he is not responding to any other redirection tool and continues to escalate and we see aggressiveness, we get right in his face and yell. His father is the only one who can use this tool the most effectively. His brother can, on rare occasions. It works, however.
Here's the rest of the our story. When my son's anxiety escalates to enormous, unbearable levels, he is usually only aggressive on himself; pulling hair, choking himself. There was one time several years ago that he took the cutting board and placed it on his stomach and took a large knife and stabbed the cutting board over and over. You only need to live through one of those situations to realize that you have to help redirect thought patterns. (Quite frankly, we have had too many of "those" experiences to share. )
Where do these types of redirecting episodes happen? For us, it is most often at home. Night time right before bed he sometimes needs help. We redirect with memories of places we have been and ask him to recreate the sight, smell, sounds. This is a tool that helps. However, any public situation causes anxiety for my son, so it does happen other places. Recently, he was having a bad day in church. During the last few minutes while we were almost ready to dismiss, I glanced at him. (I am programmed to do this often.) He was acting all crazy, holding his head, bobbing up and down, making faces, and I had to redirect. I quickly touched my husband and we huddled around him, held him, and starting talking to him calmly in his ear. He had so many rapid thoughts he was beside himself.
People, many years ago I lost that "what will people think" mindset. It doesn't matter. What matters is helping my child cope with life. We stay alert to my son's anxiety level, moods, and behavior 24/7. It keeps him functioning better daily. It keeps our home more at peace. It keeps our family more at peace. We use redirecting tools constantly throughout the day. It's just a part of life for us.
Thanks for stopping by.
Lynne
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